Women love to shop. It is the one area of the world where they feel like they're actually to in be in command of.
Woman especially love a good buy. The question of "require" is unrelated, so don't bother pointing it out. Anything on sale is fair game.
Women never have anything to wear. Don't query the racks of clothes in the closet; you "just don't appreciate".
Woman need to shed tears. And they won't do it alone except they know you can hear them.
Women will always raise questions that have no right answer, in an attempt to trap you into feeling accountable.
Woman love to talk. Silence intimidates them and they feel a want to fill it, even if they have nothing to say.
Women need to feel like there are people not as good as they are. That's why soap operas and Oprah Winfrey-type shows are doing well.
Woman don't need sex as frequently as men do. This is because sex is more physical for men and more emotional for women. Just knowing that the man wants to have sex with them fulfills the arousing need.
Women hate bugs. Even the strong-minded ones need a man around when there's a spider or a wasp involved.
Woman can't maintain secrets. They eat away at them from the inside. And they don't view it as being unreliable, as long as they only tell two or three people.
Women always go to public restrooms in groups. It gives them a opportunity to gossip.
Woman can't say no to answer a ringing phone, no matter what she's doing. It might be the lottery calling.
Women never comprehend why men love toys. Men recognize that they wouldn't need toys if they had an "on/off" button.
Woman think all beer is the same.
Women keep three different shampoos and two different conditioners in the shower. After they shower, the bathroom will smell like a tropical rain forest.
Women don't appreciate the appeal of sports. Men seek leisure that allows them to escape reality. They seek activity that reminds them of how nasty things could be.
If a man goes on a seven-day outing, he'll bundle five days worth of clothing and will put on some things twice; if a woman goes on a seven-day trip she'll pack 21 outfits since she doesn't know what she'll feel like wearing each day.
Woman brush their hair prior to bed.
Watch a woman eat an ice cream cone and you'll have a pretty good inspiration about how she'll be in bed.
Women are rewarded less than men, except for one field: Modeling.
Woman are never wrong. Apologizing is the man's duty, "It's there in the holy book". Hmmm, who was it that gave Adam the apple?
Women do not know anything about cars. "Oil- stick, oil doesn't stick?"
Woman have superior restrooms. They get the nice chairs and red carpet. Men just get a large bowl to share.
The average number of items in a usual woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to recognize most of these items.
Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.
Woman love to chat on the phone. A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours.
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, or get the mail.
They will drive miles out of their way to keep away from the likelihood of getting lost using a shortcut.
Woman don't make an effort as hard as men during sex; after all, they don't fall asleep after wards.
Women do NOT want an sincere answer to the question, 'How do I look?'
PMS stands for: Permissible Man-Slaughter. (Or in any case men think it means that. PMS also stands for Preposterous Mood Swings and Punish My Spouse.
The first nude man a woman sees is "Ken".
Women are apprehensive about their weight, butt, and breast sizes.
Woman will make three right-hand turns to avoid making one left-hand turn.
"Oh, nothing," has a totally different meaning in woman-lingo than it does in a man’s verbal communication.
Lewis Carroll's Caterpillar had nothing on the fairer sex.
Woman cannot use a map without turning the map to match to the direction that they are heading.
All adult females are overweight by definition; don't agree with them about it. Women always have 5 pounds to lose, but don't bring this up unless they really have 5 pounds to gain.
If it is not Valentines day and you see a man in a flower shop, you can almost certainly start up a conversation by asking, "What did you do?"
Only women understand the rationale for "guest towels" and the "good china".
The fairer sex want equal rights, but you hardly ever hear them clamoring to be let into the draft to cover the responsibilities that go with those rights. All women seek equality with men until it comes to sharing the closet, taking out the trash, and picking up the check.
Origin of the word "woman" is: woo-man.
If a man ticks off a woman she will often react by getting a fuzzy toilet cover which warms their rear, but makes it not possible for the lid to stay up thus it frequently gets peed on by the guys. (which gets them in more trouble)
Women never check to see if the lid is up. They seem to prefer taking a flying butt leap towards the bowl and then chewing men out because they "left the seat up" instead of taking two seconds and lowering it themselves.
They can get out of speeding tickets by pouting. This will get men arrested.
Females don't really care about a sense of humor in a guy despite claims to the contrary. You don't see women trampling over Tom Cruise to get to Gilbert Gottfried, do you?
Women fake orgasm because men fake foreplay.
It's okay for them to dance with each other and not be gay. You don't see straight men dancing together.
They will splurge hours dressing up to go out, and then they'll go out and spend more time checking out other women. Men can never catch women checking out other men; women will always catch men checking out other women.
The most awkward thing for women is to find another woman wearing the same dress at a formal party. You don't hear men say, "Oh-my-GOD, there's another man wearing a black tux, get me outta here!"
0 comments:
Post a Comment