Thursday, July 24, 2014
If both you and your partner want to invest in and reinforce or fix the problems in your relationship, consider getting marriage counselling to help you realize that goal. There are some important things you could do to prepare for your first session to be more meaningful and fruitful.
1. Know that your marriage counselor isn't responsible for fixing your marriage. He serves as a guide in making necessary changes on your own, which happen mostly outside of the office.
2. The sooner you and your spouse enter marriage therapy when tough situations emerge, the better. Often, couples wait until they're on the verge of ending the relationship before seeking professional help. Marriage counselling therapy could still be effective in such situation, however it is best not to wait for this to happen. Taking charge of the issues in the marriage and not allowing them to tear both of you apart could empower you.
3. You and your spouse should consider and recognize the roles you both have in the marital issues. It's easy to point a finger on the other person and quite difficult to take responsibility. Now is the time to prepare for own your part. But if you're not ready for this that's okay. But, know that this will arise soon in your counselling therapy.
4. Both of you should contemplate about what your marriage really means to you and whether you're both willing to make the necessary changes. When you and your spouse make positive changes that are meaningful to your spouse, they serve as reinforcement and can result in more positive changes. Right now, you may not be ready to make changes, but this will be tackled in the marriage counselling process.
5. Keep in mind that you cannot change your partner. Often, couples attend marriage therapy blaming the other person. Instead, focus on making positive changes.
6. Don't consider your relationship problem as "unfixable." Keep in mind that it's not the severity of a problem that determines how long the relationship can last. What's important is how the husband and the wife communicate about the problem. Your marriage counselor will teach you effective communication skills that can help you re-establish trust and reconnect with each other.
To have an effective marriage counselling, reflect on these points before attending your first therapy. Visit victorian counselling & psychological services by following the given link to learn more about how marriage counselling will work for both you and your spouse.
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